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Positive Interpersonal Programming

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Marriage and Family

PIP helps you look at yourself and at your marriage and family relationships.  It is not a test.  Rather, PIP enables you to see your stronger and less strong areas, those things that you do better and those things that you do less well, those things within which you should find pride and satisfaction and those things deserving a little more time and attention from you.

Each section focuses on an important area of marriage and family life.  Within each section are several statements about the most important interpersonal elements for that area.  Going through all of the sections and statements will help you look at your strengths area by area and specifically at your strengths and less strong points within each area.

To the left of the statements within each section is a blank.  Put a “5” on the blank if the statement is always true for you.  Put a “4” if it is usually true for you.  Put a “3” if it is sometimes true for you.  Put a “2” on the blank if the statement is seldom true and a “1” if it is almost never true for you.

5 = almost always true

4 = usually true

3 = sometimes true

2 = seldom true

1 = almost never true

Once you have finished a section, add together your ratings for all of the statements in that section.  This will give you a combined score.  Next, divide the combined score by the number of statements in the section.  This will give you an average score for that section.  Write in your average score for the section in the blank to the left at the beginning of the section.  Once you have finished all sections, add together your average scores for each section and then divide by the total number of sections. This will give you a composite score indicating how well you function overall as a marriage partner and family member.

Once you are finished, you will find that you have some points that represent real strengths for you and some points that represent less strong elements.  The goal is to work toward average scores of “4” or above within each section and an overall composite score of “4” or above.

How do you achieve this level?  Go back to the individual statements, locating those statements where you gave yourself a “1”, “2”, or “3”.  These represent the specific things on which you need to work.

It is important to use two approaches.  First, be sure that you spend most of your time and energy doing those things that you do well: those things where you gave yourself a “4” or “5”.  Do what you do well and do it as much as possible.

Next, begin to give some time, thought, and energy to increasing how often you show the behavior, attitude, characteristics, and so on shown in those statements where you gave yourself lower ratings.  Emphasize your strong points and gradually strengthen your less strong areas.

Below, remember to limit your responses to your relationship with others at home.

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